Hot Teachers

That ment when you walk into one of your average classes and find a beautiful substitute. Honestly, I could be in this classroom forever if he let me. Hell, someone call for a lock down >w<
.......................

Omg<3<3 He just bumped into me! His voice is like scratchy in a way where it sounds like he is getting over a cold. Hair is short and brown; shaped in a Puerto Rican style. But ladies, he indeed is NOT Puerto Rican. He is Albenian. His eyes are hazel and his skin is about two shades lighter than mine in a milky vanilla bean with a touch of caramel. (I want ice cream now ><). His ears are pierced with diamond studs. His face is shaven well but he has a bad habit of bitting his nails. Like really bad. He has broad shoulders and has an amazing round butt.
He is approximately 26? Ugh if only he were younger. 26 is unfortunately over my limit. :(

Benjamin Stone

Over the weekend, I spent my hours watching shows that I haven't watched since...what seems to be about a year ago. Either way, I came across one of my celeb crushes that I had so regrettably forgotten about. Benjamin Stone. One of the most hottest english men I have ever came across. I mean seriously ladies, have you heard his gorgeous accent? Anywhooooo....He was starring in The Nine Life of Chloe King. I really hope that show comes back with another season cause i'm dying to see him on screen again. So because he is just absolutely sexy, I thought i'd share his sexiness with you guys :3

Nightcore - I Dont Wanna Die

Loving this version...and honestly its eeriness is driving my body insane. It send shivers down my back but maybe thats just my imagination going crazy or my own unsatisfied desires taking over.
PS: this is originally a Hollywood Undead song.

I don't wanna die,
I don't wanna die,
I don't wanna die - So you're gonna have to.

I don't wanna die,
I don't wanna die,
No I don't wanna die - So you're gonna have to.

Blood is getter hotter
Body's getting colder...

I've told you once,
I'm the only one who holds her.

I don't wanna die,
I don't wanna die,
I don't wanna die - So you're gonna have to

I look inside of myself, and try to find someone else.
Someone who's willing to die, just to watch you crying for help.
I know that blood will be spilled, and if you wont - then I will. My grave will never be filled, It's either kill or be killed. So let heaven be told, that some may come, some may go, where I'll end up, I don't know. But I ain't dying alone, I keep on asking the question, ''can I be saved by confession?'', you see this blood on my hands and there's no reach into heaven

I got to pick up the pieces, I got to bury them deep... And when you look in my eyes, I'll be the last thing you see,
I don't wanna die,
I don't wanna die,
I don't wanna die -So you're gonna have to.

I don't wanna die,
I don't wanna die,
No I don't wanna die - So you're gonna have to.

Blood is getter hotter
Body's getting colder...

I've told you once,
I'm the only one who holds her.

Hurt turned into blood, and the blood keeps on pouring, From every pour I wipe it up, this is just to be demoted.

Now someone started dying, my only opponent? 'Cause I wont watch my baby cry, So I keep on just going. Am I a man or a beast, or mother nature at least, watch humanity cease, Cause it's our human disease. You got to kill when you gotta kill, Yeah that's what they say. And I can't go against God's will, You better pray.

'Cause I'm an angel, a demon.
Yeah I'm hell and I'm heaven. I'm everything you couldn't be, now you believe in the devil.

I got to pick up the pieces, I got to bury them deep... And when the dirt hits the coffin - Just go to sleep.

I don't wanna die,
I don't wanna die,
I don't wanna die - So you're gonna have to.

I don't wanna die,
I don't wanna die,
No I don't wanna die - So you're gonna have to.

Blood is getter hotter
Body's getting colder...

I've told you once,
I'm the only one who holds her,
I don't wanna die,
I don't wanna die,
I don't wanna die...

Now that I see You buried... Six feet below.

Another life, goes into the night. I couldn't let him breathe, 'Cause I didn't wanna die...

Now that I see You buried... Six feet below.

It's not alright... Can you hear me as I cry? I couldn't let you live, 'Cause I didn't wanna die...

I don't wanna die,
I don't wanna die,
I don't wanna die - So you're gonna have to.

I don't wanna die,
I don't wanna die,
No I don't wanna die - So you're gonna have to.

I Don't wanna die.
You didn't have to die.

Hollywood undead - Levitate

I'm dying a little each time he walks away but what's worse is that as much as I try to stray away from the knife, I know it will always be there to haunt me even in my sleep. I can't help myself and no can help me. It's something I must do on my own... I just wish I werent on it like a drug...

Maybe if life wasnt dealt the way it was for me, then things would be different...maybe I would be different. In a different place. A positive space. When everything is gone...will I only lave drops of blood behind?




"Levitate"

[J-Dog:]
Can't stop I need some help.
Fuck you, I'm by myself
Is it a truth or lie?
It's what you can't deny.
'Cause it's the way you think
Mix with the pills and drink
Brought back to the way you are
Float up 'til you're close to God
You know that hiding ain't gonna keep you safe
Because the tears on your face
They leak and leave a trace
So just when you think that true love's begun
It goes off at any second just like a loaded gun

[Danny:]
You know, I can take you straight to heaven if you let me...
You know I, I can make your body levitate if you let me...
You know that I can make your body levitate... le-levitate...
I can make your body levitate... le-levitate! (you know...)

[J-3-T:]
Can't stop the feeling,
High as a ceiling
I got the money who's fuckin'dealin'
You feel the heat like a barrel of a gun
I forgot the last time I saw the sun
I've got this disease
It's digging deeper in me
It's like my mind is leaving,
But my heart keeps beating
So I'll paint the walls, red drip from the nose
But where it goes, nobody really knows
Hit the bottle and she's gonna to follow
I fall asleep there ain't no tomorrow
Gone too far, no one can save me
Who needs you when I've got my baby
My baby is beautiful she loves me true
But if she dies I hope I die too!

[Danny:]
You know, I can take you straight to heaven if you let me...
You know I, I can make your body levitate if you let me...
You know that I can make your body levitate... le-levitate...
I can make your body levitate... le-levitate! (you know...)

[Charlie Scene:]
I put down another sack of them
Then it's straight back to the flask again
I can't help stop what's happening
On the wrong track, yeah, I'm back again
Up shit creek and I'm paddling
Blacked out room and I'm travelin'
Good ideas I'm lacking them
I'm too fucked up now I'm babbling
Wondering how to fix these damages
All these goddamn damages
Cover myself with bandages
From all these goddamn damages
Wondering how to fix all of these damages
All these goddamn damages
Cover myself with bandages
From all these goddamn damages

[Danny:]
You know, I can take you straight to heaven if you let me...
You know I, I can make your body levitate if you let me...
You know that I can make your body levitate... le-levitate...
I can make your body levitate... le-levitate! (you know...)

This Past Weekend

i did it again...i thought that with time i wouldnt have to or feel the need to do it. but i did... im feeling incredibly useless and powerless now...and you know whats the worst part? i liked it...i missed it... i wanted it more than anything. i mean..i tried so hard to avoid it... tried to distract my mind, tried focusing on others, i ran out of the house a couple times, i even took late night showers and baths and yet theres no way i can escape its calling...

it feels so good.. seeing it touch my skin...it smells amazing... its intoxicating... almost as intoxicating as my ex... heh.. its funny...he was my drug...i wanted him all the time... even when i hated some of the stuff he did or got upset with him or by him...i still wanted him...more than anything... now its lke this cold slim nd sharp thing has taken his place...in some twisted way...im happy it is. ive wanted to let him go for the longest time... and even though i still love him and crave him every second of the day...for the moment that my skin splits its like i dont feel that need...that want...that love.

ive experimented too.. no not drugs haha. but ive tried different parts of my body... its almost as delicious as my forearms but its like it brings more ecstacy to the moment. my sides are a bit scratched up....not as bad as my forearms but the second i felt it...the way it slid about my waistline...the icy shiver it brought to my chest....to be honest.. i moaned a little..

as i heard the echo of my moan...my memories started to flow back.. the happier ones to be exact... i was lying on my back... the love of my life was resting beside me and it was the middle of winter.. we had just finished playing and i was looking up at the stars; thanking each one for allowing me to feel that way.

just as quickly as that memory came it left... after a couple seconds i realized my tears were soaking my cheeks.. could i really be crying at a moment like this? have i gone insane? i just cut myself! i just pressed a knife into my skin! and im crying because i miss the one boy that made my world worth while? really?!

i sliced my skin in a couple more times, each time let my tears slow and brought me back to the present. my anger simmered down and i realized the water was mixed with a soft red. i stared at it for a bit... my mothers face appeared in front of me and i quickly held my nose and push my head back into the water. i stayed under for what seemed forever.

i felt calm... my hair felt soft against my cheeks and whiped around as i continuously pressed my head furthur and furthur into the bottom of the tub. i didnt want to breathe...i didnt want to take on the world... i liked being by myself...feeling like no one could touch me... like the water was infinite.. like the elements were watching over me... after awhile i needed oxygen... as annoying as it was i let my body rise up along with my head and it was over... it was all over for those few moments and i felt good...i felt like i could sleep again...i could finally sleep without the thought of him.